Adventures Aging Books Frances Podcast TTT Sarah Ahmadi Season 4

Season 4 Episode 27: The Trio on Living the Age We Are, Right Now

Welcome to Tea, Toast and Trivia.

Thank you for listening in.


I am your host, Rebecca Budd, and I look forward to sharing this moment with you.

Today, I am joined by my mother, Frances and my sister, Sarah for a discussion on the question: What does it feel like to be the age that you are, right now?

I invite you to put the kettle on and add to this exciting conversation.

Frances, Sarah and I look forward to your thoughts on Tea Toast & Trivia!

Until next time we meet, safe travels wherever your adventures take you.

Rebecca, Frances & Sarah

The Trio on Living the Age We Are, Right Now Tea. Toast. & Trivia.

By Rebecca Budd

Blogger, Visual Storyteller, Podcaster, Traveler and Life-long Learner

45 replies on “Season 4 Episode 27: The Trio on Living the Age We Are, Right Now”

I keep on thinking of you and me sitting in a pew listening to our fathers. I treasure these memories. How wonderful to have parents that were excellent role models – that believed in life-long learning and “walked the talk.”

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HI Rebecca, I really enjoyed this podcast. I agree with your sister, Sarah, that you are on your own path of learning. I believe completely that formal learning is only one aspect of learning and there are so many other ways to self improvement of both yourself and others. Your mother is wonderful how she enjoys life and manages to get about and do things. My mom is also like this, but she is younger at only 83. Sarah is also inspirational, undertaking formal learning in something she wants to know more about. I have looked into further degrees, but I have found that for me, self study works better. I learn what I want to know and don’t need to bother with the stuff that doesn’t interest me. I have learned a lot about economics and also literature and creative writing.

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Robbie – you make excellent points about learning. Learning is complex and involves intricate processes that I do not fully understand. I have come to understand that until I am actively involved, I never fully realize the benefits of learning. Text books offer knowledge, but it is in the doing where I have obtained experience, and little wisdom along the way. As I age, I feel the freedom to explore possibilities to take more risk in trying to things. I’m even thinking of poetry – and that is something that I NEVER thought that I would do! But thanks to the encouragement of a supportive blogging community: ie. You, Sally, Debby, Colleen, Liz – I am ready to embark on a poetry journey. I am not as afraid of failure and even welcome it as a “growth moment.”

Thank you for your comments and visit – very much appreciated.

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Hi Rebecca, I read the most interesting thing on Marsha Ingrao’s blog the other day about learning and how a small number of people solve complex problems backwards which is what I do. I even write the endings of my stories before I start. There is a name for people like me – backwards mappers. I was so pleased to learn this because I don’t know anyone else who problem solves like I do. It’s always good to learn you aren’t an alien – haha!

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This is a terrific topic, and the conversation is wise and moving and inspiring. Thank you, Rebecca, Frances, and Sarah! All three of you are role models for living life well in one’s 50s, 60s, 90s, or any age.

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Many thanks for your heartwarming comments. Frances, Sarah and I have the best conversations. I have been thinking a great deal about the idea of cultural memory, what passes from one generation to the other. We know history because someone wrote about it or, in many cases, passed it down through oral stories. Now, that we have technology to enhance the narratives of our generation. Writers, poets, musicians are known to be society’s storytellers, but I believe that we are all writing a story simply by living.

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One day, Becky! I hope to encourage writers to share their stories using their voices. I started reciting poetry to an empty room for several years, then I went outside and recited poetry in nature. When words are given voice, there is an emotional nuance that comes through.

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It was so nice to spend time with the three of you, Rebecca. I enjoyed “meeting” your family.

I agree with Sarah that we become more authentic as we age. I am also impressed that she is continuing her formal education.

I agree with the statements about the value of learning, but I worry that a lot of people stop (or would like to stop) learning as they age. To be 91 and still wanting to learn is inspirational for me. If I make it to 91, I hope I will still want to learn. In addition to telling us that we would always be able to learn, my father stressed that we can learn something from everyone. Your podcasts prove that to be true.

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Many thanks from Sarah, Frances and me for joining the conversation, Dan. If anyone will be still learning at 91 it will be you! I think your father would have loved to be in this conversation. He was so right!!! We CAN learn something from everyone. Thank you for your support and encouragement of these conversations!

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You just know I always enjoy these conversations. Learning doesn’t always produce happiness and pleasure since there’s plenty of tragedy to fill the ‘pages’ yet a positive attitude of gratitude is important to cultivate, if it doesn’t come easily. I suppose I identify with Frances the most even though I’m a couple decades younger, because mobility is a constant challenge for me. Counting our blessings is indeed the secret to enjoying whatever age we are. The most shocking thing about aging is looking in the mirror. It doesn’t match my youthful mind! 🙂 Hugs+++

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Many thanks for listening in, Mary Jo. Frances, Sarah and I are delighted that you joined the conversations. I agree wholeheartedly, learning doesn’t always produce happiness for tragedy and sadness, along with joy are part of the human experience. Learning is about acquiring knowledge and with it, hopefully, a little wisdom. Many times I feel that I will never fully understand the process of learning.

By the wya, when we get together for a podcast, we usually begin and then begin again and again, because we all seem to want to speak at the same time or end up laughing too much!! LOL. So we have now started to raise our hands so that there will not be any confusion!!

Sneak preview, Sarah and I just finished recording her thoughts on the book she read, “Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence.” Our conversation will be published on The Book Dialogue in a few weeks once Don finishes the post-production process. Sarah finds the best books. It’s about finding the delicate balance between pleasure and pain and that we are becoming vulnerable to compulsive over consumption. Very interesting.

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I really look forward to the upcoming discussion on The Book Dialogue! Don is so skilled with post-production, I’d never have guessed you laugh too much and speak over one another. You’re so professional, but I can easily detect the undercurrent of fun and love you all share. Those of us who love learning have difficulty controlling our enthusiasm. 🙂

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I listened to every second of this podcast and enjoyed listening to your different perspectives. I think the key to me is accepting our limitations yet summoning up the courage to try new things and seeing each new day as an opportunity to learn something new. I’ve recently spent a lot of time with people close to Frances’s age. Three of the people I read to are 93, yet their positivity rubs off on me.

We are part of this beautiful thing called life. We can either embrace it or focus on the negative. For me, that’s an easy choice because who wants to be around negative people? I see three family members (Frances, Rebecca, and Sarah) who have figured out what works best for them. No regrets, and bless you for the example you set for the rest of us.

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Thank you so much for your heartwarming and encouraging comments, Pete. I agree – the key is accepting our limitations yet summoning up the courage to try new things. I guess it is holding your breath, diving out into the unknown, and waiting for your wings to appear! I am very interested in your reading to people of age. I can only imagine how wonderful that must be for someone to read to them. It would be entertaining as well as a comfort of being within a community. Many thanks for your support and encouragement of these conversations. Very very much appreciated.

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I loved your beautiful family interview Rebecca. Your mother is such a sweety. God bless you Frances! What a wonderful attitude and I love that you are enjoying life to it’s fullest. We never stop learning. And if we do, we are certainly going to fall behind the times and miss out on something. I also loved when Sarah said, we get choosier as we age. I truly believe that. We’ve been around long enough to know what we want and like and have earned the right not to have to be subjected to things or people who don’t fulfill us. Yay for Sarah going back to earn a degree! Gratitude is certainly an attitude, and I thoroughly enjoyed listening to you Rebecca and your wonderful mother and sister. Hugs all ’round! ❤ xx

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Thank you Debby for your heartwarming comments. Frances and Sarah are delighted that you joined the conversation. I am glad that Sarah has embarked on an academic journey, which is something that she had on her “to do” list for a long time. I am grateful for our friendship, Debby and look forward to many conversations about learning, living in the now, and celebrating community. Hugs and more hugs!

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How awesome to have the three of you there, and what a wonderful and interesting topic. I totally agree that age is relative and how old I feel changes from day to day. In my old career as a counselor, I saw many examples of how attitude shaped people’s lives regardless of their challenges. I liked Sarah’s statement about how being older gives us more freedom to be ourselves and to explore, and Francis’s praise of being a life-long learner. A beautiful post, Rebecca. Thanks for sharing your family with me. ❤

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Sarah, Frances and I are so very pleased that you joined the conversation. When I was contemplating retirement, I read Mary Catherine Bateson (Margaret Meads daughter), Composing a Further Life: The Age of Active Wisdom.

I love the term – the age of active wisdom, and then considered the question of what did it mean to bring all of our knowledge and experience into a specific point in time. There must be a catalyst that adds the “wisdom” ingredient. LOL. This is the quote that resonated:

“As we age we have not only to readdress earlier developmental crises but also somehow to find the way to three affirmations that may seem to conflict. … We have to affirm our own life. We have to affirm our own death. And we have to affirm love, both given and received.”

Always enjoy our conversations, Diana!

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What a lovely quote, Rebecca. “We have to affirm our own death” is one that probably makes people think the most. I honestly believe that it’s our full awareness and acceptance of our mortality that frees us to live in the moment with the most joy. ❤

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Such a marvelous and uplifting post! You are a beautiful trio! My mother often told me in her late eighties that ‘you don’t feel old on the inside’. She taught me that finding joy has nothing to do with age. You are so right…today is the day to celebrate whatever our age! 🙂 (Your mother is absolutely delightful…a bright and beautiful spark!)

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Thank you Linda, for listening in and adding to this conversation. I agree – we need to celebrate whatever our age. I love what your mother said “you don’t feel old on the inside.” That is the key to joy, isn’t it? To feel fresh, alive and open to possibilities!!! Sending hugs!

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I loved it Rebecca and meeting your mother Frances and sister Sarah was an absolute treat. I agree with Frances completely and thank every day that I still have the desire to learn and engage. Your sister too is right that we all have our own learning path and certainly I would say that both your journeys were blessed by having a mother and father who loved the world, history and discovery… ♥♥

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Many,many thanks for listening in, Sally. Frances, Sarah and I truly appreciate your heartwarming words. You are the epitome of life-long learning. Your celebrate knowledge acquisition and encourage others to foster a spirit of curiosity and exploration. I am grateful for our connection and look forward to many conversations that are awaiting our arrival. Sending hugs and more hugs.

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A delightful interview Rebecca… for your mother to reach that age and still be able to read and learn is marvellous and I am in total agreeance that our brain doesn’t reflect our age as our bodies do…Mine certainly doesn’t …:) xx

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How wonderful to read your heartwarming comments, Carol. Frances and I are reading War & Peace this year which will take us all year, reading 1 chapter per day. I am glad that we have the technology that we can increase the font size. Without a doubt, being part of a blogging community has increased access to learning. I learn something new every time I stop by your blog! Have a wonderful time in the UK, catching up with family and friends. I am looking forward to hearing about the restoration of the fireplace that used to cook bread.

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It was wonderful to see and I am sure when it is restored it will be a marvelous sight…Yes I am having a wonderful time and it is so lovely to see my grandchildren all grown up and following their dreams…War and Peace that is a challenge which I’m sure you will complete it made even more special for you reading it with Frances 🙂 x

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