Welcome to Tea, Toast and Trivia.
Thank you for listening in!

I am you host, Rebecca Budd and I am looking forward to sharing this moment with you. Today, I’m heading over the Canadian Rockies to St. Albert, Alberta.
Brian, my brother, has come back to continue the conversation on embracing a greater journey. In our last podcast, we discussed the stages of life, from childhood to old age. How do we live the fullest in that stage of life that we find ourselves in? How do we embrace the twists and turns that life gives us? How do we gracefully give up the things of youth and embrace the age of active wisdom?
Today, Brian and I will be discussing FOMO, which is the short form of “fear of missing out.” FOMO is that uncomfortable, even anxious, feeling you get when think that other people might be having a good time without you. Going back to the stage concept, FOMO can happen at any place on that life I understand that this can happen at any point on that “from childhood to old age” timeline.
So put the kettle on and add to the conversation on TeaToastTrivia.com

32 replies on “Season 2 Episode 45: Brian on Fear of Missing Out”
I like the way your brother thinks about life. and puts his thoughts into action!
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I always enjoy my discussions with Brian. He mixes deep thinking with humour and keeps the entire family engaged. He is taking more time for his music these days. We enjoy the introvert/extravert conversations. Thank you so much for your heartwarming comment, Gallivanta.
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I would like to be greeted by his smile if I were travelling on public transport.
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Thank you for your heartwarming comment. I have sent your message directly to Brian. Hugs coming your way.
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Perhaps he can play for us again?
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It’s always such a pleasure listening to you two wise sages talking about life, the universe and everything! I think that the concept of FOMO is an innate part of the human experience, as Brian so perfectly explains. But it seems to have only recently been given a name and as such has become ‘a thing’. I love the related idea of JOMO – the joy of missing out!!! Here’s a cute short BBC film for your delectation….. 😀 https://www.bbc.co.uk/ideas/videos/why-you-should-ditch-fomo-for-jomo/p07qcm4b
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I love the BBC Film on FOMO and JOMO. Did you notice the books in the background. And when he mentioned Kierkegaard – he had my full attention. I just downloaded “The Obstacle is the Way” by Ryan Holiday which is based on the thought by Marcus Aurelius and the philosophy of Stoicism, “The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way.” Will let you know how it goes. Always a joy to connect, Liz!!
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Oh, I’ll be really interested to hear what you think about the RH book. I read it a while ago and have some of his more recent stuff too. Stoic philosophy is fascinating, and Marcus Aurelius’s writing is incredible. It seems so modern. X
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Marcus Aurelius would make a brilliant blogger!! Stay tuned for my thoughts on RH.
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I just watched the JOMO video. I loved it!! I could take a whole course from that guy.
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So could I, Liz.
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🙂
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You are so right! 😀
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🙂
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Oh, Rebecca, I really appreciate how you and Brian discuss all the aspects and nuances of FOMO. As a young girl I refused to sleep, because I didn’t want to miss anything. Going through all the life stages as you present them, we can appreciate where we are along the way. Most importantly we can remember that some others struggle too, and this is what builds a compassionate community (that lovely phrase you often use). In my later stage of life, every encounter is an opportunity to give but also receive through acts of kindness. We can never have too much! Hugs to you, and thank you always for generosity in sharing your wonderful family with us. Such warmth and honesty. Always so comforting to listen to these podcasts.
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Thank you for your heartwarming comments, Mary Jo. So grateful that you joined the conversation. Brian is the philosopher, and also the comedian, of our family. I can imagine him following the school bus the first day his children went to school. He has returned to his music. He just sent me “Will the Circle Be Unbroken” one of my Father’s favourite songs. Thank you for being part of our family!!! Many hugs coming your way.
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I would love to hear Brian do “Will the Circle Be Unbroken.”
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He promised that he would send me the finished audio, Liz. That song brings back so many memories. Stay tuned….
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Staying tuned . . .
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So enjoyable listening to the two of you. I sense a great affection between Brian and yourself. I agree with Brian about the little things like just a smile, meaning a lot to people. As American author Kurt Vonnegut said, ““Enjoy the little things in life because one day you`ll look back and realize they were the big things.” FOMO is something I hadn’t really come across before, but I’m sure everyone experiences it at some time in their life. I’m definitely at the JOMO stage, feeling immense joy and gratitude at having missed out on so many of the negative experiences which many people go through. This was such a positive and enriching conversation. ❤
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I am delighted that you enjoyed this conversation. Brian has a delicious sense of humour that comes through with his philosophical discussions. He is going back to his music and just sent me his rendition of “May the circle be unbroken” one of my Father’s favorite songs. We were raised listening to records by The Carter Family. I came across FOMO is an interview about how social media has changed the way we connect. https://online.king.edu/news/psychology-of-fomo/ As I read this, I remember back to grade school when “show and tell” was a place for children to speak about something that was important. My most strongest memory occurred after Christmas break when we were asked to tell everyone about what we received for presents in “show and tell”. You can imagine the outcome. While social media may have increased the level of FOMO, the idea has been around for a while. I am with you on JOMO!! I share your immense joy and gratitude for my experiences and connections. I enjoy our conversations, Sylvia. Thank you for creating a space that offers all visitors kindness and compassion. Hugs!
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We never had ‘show and tell’ at my grade school. Maybe it hadn’t been thought of in the ‘olden days’. 😅
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I think it is something that was modified as it went along so that it was more in keeping with scholarly activities instead of discussing who received the best presents. Ah, Sylvia, I am part of the olden days too. In a conversation with Frances the other day, she was quite surprised to think that I consider myself “old.” I don’t think she considers herself old either. 😂😂😂
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That’s great! I’m sure Chris’s mom also doesn’t think of herself as old even at 107. 🤣 She sometimes says that she can’t quite believe she’s still here, but is happy that she is. ❤️
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🤗🤗🤗
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It so good to visit with Brian again! I had another “Little Rebecca” moment with the image of you chasing him as a wee tyke trying to kiss him and love on him. I first learned of FOMO from a paper a student of mine wrote. He was a parent of teenage children, and he was very worried for their mental health because they were in a constant state of anxiety glued to their phones for fear of missing out on something their friends were doing. Brian’s comments about the small things we do for other people reminded me of a conversation my husband had with a former high school classmate we hadn’t seen in well over thirty years. This classmate said that what he remembered about my brother and me was that we were friendly and kind to him. I was so taken aback.
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Kindness will always always always be remembered because it brings sense of belonging, of being validated and worthy of friendship. I can only imagine the immense joy that you felt when you heard that you and your brother were remembered for kindness. I have been thinking a great deal about kindness to self. We are sometimes our worst critics, which goes to the idea of comparison. For me, comparison is a trickster because, even when I believe that I have left comparison behind, it likes to rear its head every now and again to remind me that the journey continues….
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I know just what you mean about kindess to self. In an odd kind of way, I’ve only learned to be kind to myself through the kindness of others’ telling me to be kind to myself.
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To reach out as an Introvert, not that easy…
In February I practiced it quite a lot: went 8 times to the cinema festival, to the jazz cafe, to two political events (the Green party), for the first time to the local photo club, to the dance theater and so on. Every 2nd evening.
Well, with COVID, it all pretty much shrunk to zero ..
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I was just speaking to my mother, Frances, about how Covid has changed everything and how we must learn to adapt to a new reality. This is especially true about how we connect. It seems that we are in a play where each scene continues to evolve in unpredictable ways. Thank you so much for listening in and for your comments. Very much appreciated.
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The unpredictable is part of everything.
Some, including older ones, try to regain their former leeway, but are always endangered.
One has the feeling that one can no longer be cautious and renouncing, but didn’t earlier generations have to do the same ?!
They had to endure war and poverty.
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Indeed they did. I have enjoyed the conversations with my mother about her memories of living in the 1930’s. It was all about helping each other and building compassionate communities.
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